Casciaro recommends a tactical approach: “Find the hook that makes your similarities more visible.For example I might meet a man in his 60s and I’m a woman in my 30s but we both like basketball.” Also, figure out how to help someone else get what they need.“Recognize what you’re trying to get done and who you are trying to get it done with.
It’s hard to underestimate the impact of good social skills on your career.
In fact, across the board, in a wide variety of businesses, people would rather work with someone who is likeable and incompetent than with someone who is skilled and obnoxious, said Tiziana Casciaro, professor at Harvard Business School, whom I spoke to on the phone.
“How we value competence changes depending on whether we like someone or not.” And people who lack social competence end up looking like they lack other competencies, too.
When it comes to holding down a job, social skills matter today more than ever.
For people who want to break into a popular field like entertainment, for example, the only way to differentiate yourself at the bottom is to be likeable.